After most terrorist attacks, there are dead victims and dead terrorists. One wonders what their conversation might be like as they wait for their ultimate fate to be decided. Take the recent attack in London, for example.
Why did you kill me?
Isn’t this a better place?
Maybe, but I’ve not had a chance to look around.
I wish they’d hurry up.
Can’t wait to get at your seventy and seven huris, eh?
It’s not that, I don’t want to have to pray in front of all these unbelievers.
Then you shouldn’t have killed so many.
It wasn’t only me, it was Hassan, the man is really crazy. But what’s the hold-up?
I guess they’re not used to dealing with so many at one time.
People are dying all the time.
Ah, but ours were out of schedule, weren’t they?
I see what you mean. That old guy wasn’t in the pub with you, was he? He must be what you would call ‘on schedule.’
Yes, look! They’re calling him. He must be being given priority treatment.
I wonder what questions we’ll be asked.
I think you know.
Why I died as a martyr?
Something like that.
I’ll refer them to Imam al-Baghdadi, he’ll sort it out.
I think you might have to speak for yourself.
Then I’ll say I was following the Imam’s orders.
That’s what all the Nazis did.
Who were the Nazis?
The people who murdered millions of Jews.
So they were also followers of the Imam.
Yes, Imam Adolf al-Berlini.
I don’t know any imam by that name but he seems to have agreed with Baghdadi.
I don’t think he was a Moslem.
If he killed so many unbelievers, he’ll be made an honorary Moslem.
Maybe you’ll have a chance to give him the good news.
Why do you say that?
I suspect you may be heading for the same place.
Ah yes, I can’t wait to get to Paradise.
I had somewhere else in mind.
Where do you want to go?
My departure came as a great shock, I’ve not really had time to decide.
I’ll help you to become a Moslem.
I’m not sure that’s what I want, after all its too late for me to become a martyr.
And you haven’t done the prayers, the fasting or the Hajj.
And I cannot recite the Quran.
No, it’s too late for you to seek salvation, you must prepare for the eternal fire.
See you there then.